Meditation of My Heart

Every now and then in life, something comes along that shakes my world and makes me reevaluate everything. I feel I was blindsided by a force beyond anything I could stand against. I was casually catching the updates, cute quips, photos and inspirational links posted by friends on facebook. Then it came from nowhere, not really welcomed and with such power it couldn't be ignored. Chinese-Made Infant Flesh Capsules Seized   The comments regarding the article discussed Chinese cannibalism with pictures of babies cooked and floating in pots. STOP. Let that really sink in for a minute. The nausea and tears wouldn't stop. Days later the pit in the stomach still remains. Oddly enough an article said that countries typically ignore it because they don't want to upset the political ties.   ??!! I have spent days absentmindedly listening to/ reading about $10 hairbows to match outfits, the newest app, registering kids for sports, the newest TV show or twist and I could...

 I experienced a painful breaking of a friendship in my life. I have been reading through a True Woman Movement book which points out that all trials in our life are chosen for us by God. I had been learning to accept this season in my life as a gift from God. This weekend at True Woman Conference was an incredible working of God stripping things from my life. So painful and so beautiful at the same time. Through the sovereignty of God, I went alone to this conference. I couldn't even find anyone I knew. I had left phone numbers at home to be able to even contact them. God isolated me. A speaker asked us to pray with those around us about things when needed to surrender to God. Those around me gathered with people they came with. In that instance, I felt utterly isolated and alone. God revealed that I desired friendship with people more than friendship with Him. I felt extremely lonely. I began to surrender with the crying out in my heart that I will give this up, but...

I am beginning to think any sermon by a leader I admire named "Brokenness" if definitely worth listening to. This is the first of the message. Worth listening to the whole message. May I be broken before God!