Meditation of My Heart

Eric Liddel was a passionate man. He lived his passion in his faith in every nook of his life. He ran ... he ran fast. He won a bronze and a gold in the 1924 Olympics. He wouldn't compete in the 100 meter runs because they were held on Sunday. He was a man of God. He lived with conviction. I am sure he heard "Well done, my good and faithful servant". I love his quote. "I believe God made me for a purpose, but he also made me fast. And when I run I feel his pleasure."  There are times when I write, not everytime, but in the quiet still times of praising God, I feel His pleasure. It is like He is pouring out His glory in my life and I have to write. In the times of snuggling kids, cleaning house, doing laundry or cooking a meal that makes the family feel I love them, I feel HIS pleasure. The times when His glory pours out into me and I do .... do whatever to the glory of God.  When do you feel His pleasure?

A little worm burrowing in the ground has no hope of communicating with a star. It wouldn't even know how to start. The vast difference is worlds away and languages apart. Yet, the star shines on the worm and covers it with its light. I feel I am much farther away from a Holy God. I desire to know Him and understand Him and try as I might, I don't even know where to start. Yet, God shines on me and calls me Beloved. What awesomeness is that!! He sees me struggle and  plea and hears. He gives me a glimpse of Him that overwhelms me, something that fills me that I don't even understand. He doesn't take pity on me.... He loves me. Words cannot express. A taste of sweetness I try to savor the flavor sweeter than anything I've known. A smell of heaven quickly blowing away as I try to understand what's shown. Oh God, my heart is swelling, wildly beating because it cannot contain Your love so filling, deeply pulsing Leaving me forever changed I we...

My heart does rend the pain of sin that clutches at my soul Who can climb free and finally be made whole The reaches of the dark stained arms stretch far beyond my sight It suffocates and twists and tears with a mighty fight Oh! To tear away the scars it burrows in my mind Lies piercing deep within my soul wrapping me in binds Destroying all within my reach because I cannot see But, alas, I beg who has the strength to finally set me free? Not one, not one of mortal man can break the bond of sin Oh, agony untold, of death that churns within Deep within the heart, its darkness who can face? This turmoil has to fall completely on Your Grace Crushed beneath the weight I bear, broken deep within my soul Yet through death, victory comes, and then He makes me whole Oh life so sweet, He paid a price, He paid a price for me! Liberating mercy, You died to set me free! Oh beloved, don’t you know, you must call upon His name Throw yourself on the cross and never b...

I was thinking about a sermon I recently listened to by Voddie Baucham. He was talking about brokenness in the life of a believer. I was considering his point about remembering who we were to point to God who brought us from there. How many times I have blown it .... and I mean really blown it as a parent. Some memories that I cringed at and felt so guilt ridden because of my sin in dealing with my kids. Oh how I wished I could change it or at the least forget it!!! Yet, now I look at those memories in a new light. What a wretch I was! But how great God is !!!! He has taken me so far. He has changed who I am. Only God could take a wretch like me and do anything with her. I have a wonderful relationship with my kids. Thanks be to God and Him alone. I see those times of total rebellion, self centeredness and immaturity and how far I have come. God has taken the years stolen and given them back ten fold. I can look back and now rejoice. I can see God's goodness, God's grace and Go...