Meditation of My Heart

Whose Rights anyway?

2012-01-28T19:16:00.001-06:00

It is definitely through the hardships of life that God does most of his sanctifying. God has used many things the past couple years to teach me hard lessons. It is hard to forgive. It is hard to let go of hurt. It is hard to give up and let things go, especially when I think I am right. Yet, I am not my own. I am bought by blood. I have to lay it all down.

Matthew 5 says:
You have heard that it was said, 'AN EYE FOR AN EYE, AND A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH.'39 But I say to you, do not resist an evil person; but whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. 40 If anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, let him have your coat also. 41 Whoever forces you to go one mile, go with him two. 42 Give to him who asks of you, and do not turn away from him who wants to borrow from you.

It continues to say
Love your enemies, pray for them who persecute you.

It is so easy to think of enemies or those who persecute as people in other countries that are called to die for Christ, to watch their houses burned and friends and family tortured for HIS name. God used the extreme of any situation here... those who are your enemies. If God wants me not only to forgive, but LOVE my enemies, do I not think He wants me to love those who are a thorn in the side, a nuisance, add stress to my life or deeply hurt me. Love them! It is a high calling and not doable in my own strength. It happens as God changes me to look more like Him.

Forgiveness is so much God's will that it will affect our relationship with God if we don't. I have found often that when I won't forgive I am holding on to pride. There is some part of me that believes I deserve better treatment. It is my right.

I am required to do this because I have no rights. None. A slave should care for nothing except the will of his master.

Or do you not know that your body is a [fn11] temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from [fn12] God, and that you are not your own? 20 For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body.

I am free to love because I am not my own. I am free to forgive because it is His job to take care of me. I have heard often times that we are the slaves of Christ. However, when Christ purchased us with His blood as His slaves, He also in doing so took on the role of Master. It is His job by His covenant with us to protect us. How glorious is that! How undeserved and God in is His goodness grants us a position of protection from anything He doesn't see fit for us to endure.

So then am I to become a doormat, someone to be tossed around and used by anyone? No! Let's look at the person we are struggling with to love, let us look at the person that has hurt us deeply. As a bond servant of the Most High I am to obey what God wants for the best for myself. I need to know the scriptures, who God is and how He wants me to live. The Bible tells us that it is not wise to fellowship with fools, the ungodly or "Christians" living in unrepentant sin. We are not to allow them into our home, and as in principle our intimate lives, those that cause dissension or teach heresy. We are to abstain from evil. However, I will not be rejecting them, I will be obeying God's principles that He has laid out for me to live by. I am obeying my master.

So the next time I come across a difficult person, it is easier to love, forgive because I know they don't answer to me but to God for the Master is responsible for his slave. I need to love because without Him, I would be just like them and many times I still act in the flesh. I can go the extra mile, show the kindness, be polite, witness within God's protective limits because He cares for me.

Can that faith save you?

2011-07-16T09:48:00.001-05:00

I would invite you to read James 2:14-26 before reading my post.
What use is it, my brethren, if a man says he has faith but he has no works can that faith save him? James 2:14
Strong's defines the word faith as conviction respecting man's relationship to God and divine things with the idea of trust and holy fervour born of faith and joined with it.
1828 dictionary describes fervour as earnestness in the duties of religion. It describes earnestness as zeal. Faith is zeal over the things of God.

Save means to keep safe from Messianic judgment. Hell.
I believe James is addressing the same problem we have today. "Can your faith save you?"Is faith alone enough? Does asking Jesus into your heart mark spiritual rebirth?

Now I can already hear the cries of salvation is by grace alone. Please read the whole post. I am not arguing against that. Salvation is always by grace and not works.
James asks a few rhetorical questions throughout the book. In verse James 3:11: Can a fountain send forth sweet and bitter water? Can a fig tree, my brethren, produce olives, or a vine produce figs? Nor can salt water produce fresh. The answer is obvious... NO!

Continuing in James, he addressing the same question in different ways to make it quite clear.

James 2:17 Even so faith, if it has no works, is dead, being by itself. Dead comes from the root word corpse. No life. That again is not a picture of saving faith. Lazarus was a picture of salvation, the resurrection of our dead spirit. He was brought to LIFE. Remember when Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit. What was the consequence? Death. Their spirits died immediately. They lost communion with God. Ezekiel again paints of picture of salvation in the valley of the dead bones in Ezekiel 37. God asks Ezekiel if those bones would live again. Ezekiel responds, "Oh, Lord God you know". "Thus says the Lord GOD to these bones, 'Behold, I will cause breath to enter you that you may come to life." Wow! Gives me chills! Faith and the work of God produces life.

Again James 2:17 states the faith without works is dead. No life.

You believe God is one you do well. There are two types of faith. An intelluctual faith and a saving faith. God is one is quite a statement. One would be acknowledging one true God and Jesus as God. Yet the demons believe that. Yet their belief doesn't save them.

But are you willing to recognize, you foolish fellow, that faith without works is useless? For just as the body without the spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead.

He continues in 20,24,25 that man in justified by works. Abraham was saved by works, Rahab was justified by works. Man is justified by works and not by faith alone.(vs 24)

I have heard James used to support a works salvation. Never. The Bible doesn't contradict itself. James' message is one that is throughout scripture. You see it in verse 23 and the Scripture was fulfilled which says, "AND ABRAHAM BELIEVED GOD, AND IT WAS RECKONED TO HIM AS RIGHTEOUSNESS," and he was called the friend of God.

It seems you have this chapter going on and on about works, then out of nowhere comes this verse and Abraham believed God. But wait ... shouldn't it say that Abraham did great things for God? You see faith was working along with his works. The word believed is in Aorist tense. It means that it never stops.

James is making the point that Abraham believed God and because of his belief in God, he obeyed God. The result of that faith was works.

Salvation is by grace. Nothing we have done to merit it. Such glorious love of God! However, when we are saved there WILL be works. If dead bones arise or a dead man comes from a grave, you will see a difference. How would you react if you saw a dead animal laying on a lawn and asked why they wouldn't bury it and they told you, "no, it is really alive." You look at it, check to see if it is breathing, moving or has a heart beat. If it is showing none of these signs, you are going to think your friend is in serious denial.

Salvation is spiritual rebirth. Something that was dead is now alive. You expect it to breath, to have a heart beat, to eat, to move. You expect you new spirit to start to love God, follow God, seek to do and love what God loves. Not perfectly, but alive and growing. As every instance of belief in the tense form of aorist ... it is permanent. The states never changes. Everybody stumbles, everyone falls. But they will get up again and follow Him again. If there is no evidence of any spiritual life, of any spiritual change then that faith is useless, dead (stated 3 times) and we are foolish to believe in it according to James.

John Calvin describes like this

It appears certain that [James] is speaking of the manifestation, not of the imputation of righteousness, as if he had said, Those who are justified by faith prove their justification by obedience and good works, not by a bare and imaginary semblance of faith. In one word, he is not discussing the mode of justification, but requiring that the justification of all believers shall be operative. And as Paul contends that men are justified without the aid of works, so James will not allow any to be regarded as Justified who are destitute of good works ... Let them twist the words of James as they may, they will never extract out of them more than two propositions: That an empty phantom of faith does not justify, and that the believer, not contented with such an imagination, manifests his justification by good works. [Henry Beveridge, trans., John Calvin, Institutes of the Christian Religion 3:17:12 (Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 1966 reprint), 2: 115.]

John MacArthur states it this way.

Again, James echoes the Master Himself, who insisted on a theology of lordship that involved obedience, not lip-service. Jesus chided the disobedient ones who had attached themselves to Him in name only: "Why do you call Me, 'Lord, Lord,' and do not do what I say?" (Luke 6:46). Verbal allegiance, He said, will get no one to heaven: "Not everyone who says to Me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven; but he who does the will of My Father who is in heaven" (Matt. 7:21).

MacArthur's post

For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also.

‎"Cheap grace is the preaching of forgiveness without requiring repentance, baptism without church discipline, Communion without confession, absolution without personal confession. Cheap grace is grace without discipleship, grace without the cross, grace without Jesus Christ." - Dietrich Bonhoeffer

1 Corinthians 15:22 For as in Adam all die, even so in Christ shall all be made alive. Praise God!!

Adolescence

2010-10-21T22:43:00.000-05:00

Adolescence is described as a period or stage of development preceding maturity.

Recently I heard statistics that point to the fact that adolescence is not ending at 18, 19 or 20. We have begun to see adolescence clear into the 30s. This idea was foreign a few generations ago. Teenage years were a time of apprenticeship and beginning of responsibility. Girls were married at 14,15 or 16 and society thought nothing of it. Why? Their period of development preceding maturity was a child. They expected more of them by the time they became teens.

Maturity is not a black and white moment defined by reaching a certain age. Maturity is the achieving a certain level of character that defines you as trustworthy. Maturity is having self-control. Self-control to do what you need to and refrain from those things you don't.

I have noticed a lack in teaching children to be mature. The Bible says even a child is known by their doings. I fear that we are going to see adolescence reach far into middle age if the direction of parent rearing doesn't change. By the grace of God, I hope to raise my kids to glorify Him. When I discipline Benjamin for his lack of control, I do so to better his life that he may be behaving as more of an adult at 13 than most adults are.

One of my favorite quotations on maturity.

What is maturity ? Maturity is the ability to control anger and settle differences without violence or destruction. Maturity is patience. It is the willingness to pass up immediate pleasure in favor of the long-term gain. Maturity is perseverance, the ability to sweat out a project or a situation in spite of heavy opposition and discouraging set-backs. Maturity is the capacity to face unpleasantness and frustration, discomfort and defeat, without complaint or collapse. Maturity is humility. It is being big enough to say, "I was wrong." And, when right, the mature person need not experience the satisfaction of saying, "I told you so."

Maturity is the ability to make a decision and stand by it. The immature spend their lives exploring endless possibilities; then they do nothing.

Maturity means dependability, keeping one's word, coming through in a crisis. The immature are masters of the alibi. They are the confused and the disorganized. Their lives are a maze of broken promises, former friends, unfinished business, and good intentions that somehow never materialize.

Maturity is the art of living in peace with that which we cannot change, the courage to change that which should be changed -- and the wisdom to know the difference.

Friendship with God

2010-10-17T10:27:00.000-05:00

Seven months ago, I experienced a painful breaking of a friendship in my life. I have been reading through a True Woman Movement book which points out that all trials in our life are chosen for us by God. I had been learning to accept this season in my life as a gift from God.

This weekend at True Woman Conference was an incredible working of God stripping things from my life. So painful and so beautiful at the same time. Through the sovereignty of God, I went alone to this conference. I couldn't even find anyone I knew. I had left phone numbers at home to be able to even contact them. God isolated me.

A speaker asked us to pray with those around us about things when needed to surrender to God. Those around me gathered with people they came with. In that instance, I felt utterly isolated and alone. God revealed that I desired friendship with people more than friendship with Him. I felt extremely lonely. I began to surrender with the crying out in my heart that I will give this up, but I need you. Please don't leave me all alone. God revealed that I had a hard time releasing this friendship in my heart, though I had physically a long time ago. I was clinging to an idol.

I made it to the prayer room and fell to my knees and my body shook in sobs. I repented of idolatry and felt a painful cutting away of flesh and then peace. Rarely did I sit next to another woman in the conference, though I was never alone. We were asked to hold hands with those around us to pray. Again women were connecting with those they came with and the woman next to me distracted by the people next to her. This time, however, I was holding the hand of God and in complete peace. I smiled as I closed my eyes and soon after felt a woman's hand join mine. The sweetness of God. I am looking forward to the continuing of a much deeper relationship with God.

"As the deer panteth for the water, so my soul longeth after thee"

Brokenness by Nancy Leigh DeMoss

2010-09-07T19:44:00.002-05:00

I am beginning to think any sermon by a leader I admire named "Brokenness" if definitely worth listening to.
This is the first of the message. Worth listening to the whole message.

May I be broken before God!

An Act of Kindness

2010-09-03T17:15:00.000-05:00

When we moved to East Texas from the crowded city life, there were many strange differences. Things you that are just normal to small town folks that they don't even take notice to talk about them to the people living on the other side. It was strange to see a hog running along the side of a highway. Nice little changes like not having to plan a day around getting your car registered. I actually had to double check that I was at the right building when I saw there was no one in line.

Here in East Texas it is tradition that if a funeral procession is on the way from the funeral home to the grave sight that every car on both sides of the road will stop until they pass. I wish I could say someone had warned me of this tradition as I was toodling down the road with my children and had a woman from the funeral procession let me know in unrepeatable words how unhappy she was with me. The awkward embarrasment of knowing I had done something wrong, as well as the stares from the cars along the side of the road who I am sure heard the chastisement, made me seek out a reason to my offense.

I don't know if the way I was introduced to this tradition soured my thinking about it. However, I came to dread seeing the headlights coming or the police leading a procession of cars. It seemed ridiculous to me. Why stop everyone's day for someone you don't know? Respect? Needless to say, my attitude definitely didn't reflect one a child of God's should.

Fast forward a couple years. My grandma died. I was blessed to have moved into the town where she lived and get to know her as an adult. I spend many days driving her to her doctor's appointment in the next town over and enjoying lunch with her. She was apologized for taking my time away from raising my family of four girls. I always told her it was my pleasure. It truly was. It was time I HAD to make to talk. So many times, I mean to spend time with people, but life gets in the way. I cherish those days.

As we drove from the church to the family grave yard to bury her, I was now on the other side of the tradition. This city girl was able to experience the act of kindness of simple country people who took a moment out of their busy day to show compassion for those grieving. This hard heart got it! As we turned down a small country road, the only cars driving down the road were those from the funeral. Yet, a man got off his tractor and stood with his hat in his hand and bowed his head while we all drove by. I cried. Not only for my grandma but for someone who touched me so deeply by honest compassion.

I softened a lot that day. I thank God for little moments that impact my heart and help mold me into a person that better reflects Him. I might not understand many things in life, yet, I can die to myself. I can think of others first. I can give acts of kindness. I can pray for people I don't know who are going through a tough situation.

True Woman Movement - Chapter 3

2010-08-30T21:40:00.001-05:00

I have skipped a couple chapters and might post about them later. This has been a hard "assignment" for me. How do I respond in any adequate fashion to such eloquently written chapters?

Now to sum up this chapter. Do I just say Sovereignty of God? Yet the Sovereignty of God is so completely overwhelming where do we even start to comprehend that. Yet even a minuscule tidbit can so drastically throw my life in a spin that changes me forever.

What is a true woman? One that trusts so completely that God is in such control, that He CHOSE every difficult situation we are in to HIS glory in us. I can rest in my struggles because He wants me to go through them. That is so reassuring, that is the basis of my hope and my joy. It is what allows me to hum praises in the hardest of days.

Praying that I learn to live God-centered because in realty God is the center of all things. Isn't that the essence of sovereignty? If I truly grasp this, my life will reflect it. It will change the way I react to a difficult person, a trying situation, physical pain or emotional heartache because I know He is allowing this for my good and to work His good in me.

I finish with the song of Phillips, Craig and Dean playing in my head. You are God Alone!

You are God Alone!
From before time began
You were on your throne
You are God alone
in the good times and bad
You are on your throne.

I am looking forward to Fort Worth, TX this October. Love to see you there or at one close to you!
http://www.truewoman.com/

History through netflix

2010-08-27T09:39:00.012-05:00

We started Truthquest History this year and are thoroughly enjoying it. I love supplementing with hands on and movies when possible. We read the "true" stories and find it fun to find the discrepancies in the fiction and sometimes liberally influenced movies. Surprisingly we have found some really good historically Christian based movies as well. This is a good supplement to any history you are doing.

Movies are sometimes very hard to classify into specific time periods because they don't write down the exact times on most descriptions. I am trying to figure out the best way to classify these. However, I have found while studying history if we are in the general area it doesn't seem to matter. I have listed dates as closed as I could. If the movie is about someone, I have listed the years they have lived. Depending if the movie is a life story or just a part of their life will determine the years it covers.

TQ - Truthquest Recommended    FFF Feature Films for Families    DI Download Instantly

8 BC to 600 AD Drive Thru History: Greece and the Word Christian based.
                           Drive Thru History: East Meets West

1324 - 1384    John Wycliffe John Wycliffe (1320-1384) was a theologian and early proponent of reform in the Roman Catholic Church during the 14th century. He initiated the first translation of the Bible into the English language and is considered the main precursor of the Protestant Reformation.Movie has good reviews. Looks Christian based.


1685 to 1750 Glory to God Alone: The Life of J.S. Bach - An overview of the life of Bach - Christian based.

1776 to           Drive Thru History: Discovering America's Founders - Christian based

Through the 1800s you have the Pioneer Years, most are around the middle to later in the century. Cover after the Civil war which ended in 1865. The Homestead Act was passed in 1862 to encourage moving west. So I am just going to name this section the
Pioneer Years

In 1842 Seven Alone Based on a true story, Seven Alone tells the emotional story of one family's struggle during the Wagon Train days of the Old West. In the course of a grueling trip across country from Missouri to Oregon, a family is torn apart by the death of the parents. The children are forced to fend for themselves in order to stay alive, but they soldier on, determined to fulfill their parents' dreams of a new life and continue the journey they started. DI

1809-1882 Charles Darwin The Voyage that Shook the World This is done from a Christian point of view, very good. I would recommend for 7th or older. It is a very well done documentary.

Expelled - No Intelligence Allowed Another evolution/creation documentary done recently It is a PG rating. Don't remember why. It was worth watching though.

1820 to 1910  Florence Nightingale - This was a great movie, though a little long and slow at times 2 1/2 hours but an enjoyable movie, other than the love. interests it is historically accurate. It shows a little of the Crimean War as well. It does touch on her faith in God, but only briefly in a few places.

1837 to 1901 Queen Victoria - The Young Victoria. A nicely done film. Very clean. It has a PG rating. One "d" word and one use of God's name in vain.

1839 to 18?     Nickolas Nickleby This is historical fiction based on a book by Charles Dickens. It gives a good view of the poor portrayal of the poor of that era. Though only PG, use parental discretion viewing this one. It does portray drinking, abuse of children and a suicidal hanging. It has some tough messages in it but it does glorify loyalty, family, character and faith in God. We enjoyed this movie.

1854 to 1856 Crimean War Charge of the Light Brigade. TQ DI Historical Fiction

1860 to 1864?         Lyddie FFF A Canadian girl goes to work in a cotton factory to try and save the family farm. Borders on American and touches on slavery as well.

1861    Civil War Era Little Women Great classic of Louisa May Alcott. There are other versions on Netflix. I am only familiar with this one.

                      From the Civil War to Rights Movements in the 60s. The Autobiography of Miss Jane Pittman Based on the novel by Ernest J. Gaines, this highly acclaimed TV drama follows the life of Jane Pittman, a black woman born into slavery in the South during the 1850s who lives long enough to see the genesis of the Civil Rights movement in the 1960s. In 1962, 110-year-old Jane (Cicely Tyson) tells her story to a journalist (Michael Murphy). PG rating. I would not recommend this to young children. There are some scenes of violence that might be frightening. One scene in particular shows the whole group of blacks viciously killed. Not gory by today's standards at all, but still disturbing, but historically accurate. Actually I wouldn't let my kids see this until possibly jr high/highschool unless I fast forwarded. You might prewatch and fast forward through the scene. It is a very well done movie. It is fiction. DI

1867 to 1951 The Story of Amy Carmichael This was a short movie that touches on highlight's of Amy's life and a lot on Dohnavur Fellowship, it's foundation by Amy and currently. An interesting movie and definitely Christian.

1900 -          Anne of Green Gables. Historical Fiction. Setting on Price Edward Island, Canada. An idea of country Canadian life. Fun family movie. The sequels are great as well

1900-1924 Cheaper by the Dozen. DI This is such a fun classic of a movie. It is an amazingly accurate portrayel of the family. Mary died in real life at 6 and they have her in the movie the whole time (only difference). It gives a good feel for that time period.

1902-1970 Gladys Alward The Inn of Sixth Happiness. DI Film set in 1930s in China. A story of an English woman who became a missionary to China and rescues orphans there. Very good film, the romance, again is a Hollywood thing. It never happened and she was upset to have one portrayed.

1927 - C Beyond the Next Mountain This movie examines Rochunga Pudaite's life and his mission to bring the gospel to his people, the Hmar of northeast India. Branded as ruthless heathens by the British at the end of the 19th century, the Hmar were forever changed when a copy of John's Gospel made its way into their village. Rochunga's father, Chawnga, adopted Christianity and believed that his son was chosen by God to bring Christianity to the entire village.

1939-1945 - World War II
The Hiding Place In World War II-era Holland, Corrie ten Boom (Jeannette Clift, in a Golden Globe-nominated role) and her family of Christian watchmakers are quietly sheltering Jews in their small house. But when the Nazis discover the family's secret, it could mean certain death for everyone. Based on a true story, this gripping drama follows Corrie and her sister (Julie Harris) as they endure the horrors of a concentration camp and a true test of their faith. Christian based. Some tough scenes/themes for younger kids PG. Parental discretion.

Bonhoeffer: Agent of Grace Dietrich Bonhoeffer (Ulrich Tukur) pays the ultimate price for speaking out against the Nazi party in this dramatization of the German Lutheran minister's life. The clergyman actively opposes Hitler's regime, heroically condemning its atrocities. On many occasions, he has the opportunity to keep his peace and save his own life, but he stands by his moral convictions and is eventually hanged by the Nazis one month before the end of the war. (I haven't watched this... looks Christian and good. So parental discretion)

Natural Recipes

2010-07-07T17:51:00.001-05:00

A couple recipes I am finding to save us money.
I like Zoot (at our Walmart). I use 1/3 bar, it is bigger than the Fels-Naptha bar which I found at Kroger. I like the smell of it.

This I took from the Duggar family page.
Homemade Liquid Laundry Soap- Front or top load machine- best value
4 Cups - hot tap water
1 Fels-Naptha soap bar
1 Cup - Arm & Hammer Super Washing Soda*
½ Cup Borax

- Grate bar of soap and add to saucepan with water. Stir continually over medium-low heat until soap dissolves and is melted.

-Fill a 5 gallon bucket half full of hot tap water. Add melted soap, washing soda and Borax. Stir well until all powder is dissolved. Fill bucket to top with more hot water. Stir, cover and let sit overnight to thicken.

-Stir and fill a used, clean, laundry soap dispenser half full with soap and then fill rest of way with water. Shake before each use. (will gel)
-Optional: You can add 10-15 drops of essential oil per 2 gallons. Add once soap has cooled. Ideas: lavender, rosemary, tea tree oil.
-Yield: Liquid soap recipe makes 10 gallons.
-Top Load Machine- 5/8 Cup per load (Approx. 180 loads)
-Front Load Machines- ¼ Cup per load (Approx. 640 loads)
*Arm & Hammer "Super Washing Soda" - in some stores or may be purchased online here (at Meijer.com). Baking Soda will not work, nor will Arm & Hammer Detergent - It must be sodium carbonate!!

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I put vinegar in a Downey ball and it works great for softening and odors. This is a must for my husband's work shirts.
Also a couple hints for a dryer softener.
Cut dryer sheets in half.
Take a bottle of softener, dilute with two parts water. Cut a couple sponges in half. Dip one in diluted fabric softener. Squeeze out and throw in dryer.

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I don't know if you have tried those Color Catcher sheets. I saw a cool tip on a comment on a website. She by accident found out that you can use cheap dried baby wipes and throw them in the wash. They work just as well for a fraction of the cost. I haven't had a chance to try it yet.

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Just started using a homemade dishwasher soap. It seems to work pretty well so far.
1 c. washing soda
1 c. borax
1 c. salt
4 packages of Koolaid lemonade unsweetened packages. (don't use a color, it might dye things) You need the citric acid in it to keep dishes from being cloudy. If you have pure citric acid you can use a comparable amount of this.

NOTE: This worked well for a few weeks. Then the dishes seemed to quite getting as clean and had a film on them. I tried more vinegar, kool aid. No avail. We went back to soap. I left on here to see if someone else wants to try and maybe tweak to work. Let me know if you have found something that has worked for you... also if you have hard or soft water.

Voices of the True Woman Movement

2010-07-06T15:46:00.000-05:00

I feel privileged to share in blogging this new book by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. I pray that God will use this time to encourage and challenge me. I also pray that through His work in me, I might be able to encourage someone else. I realize that I can only be a vessel of His work. I am the tool, He is the master.

I pray that during the next few weeks or months that God will challenge me and others to become woman for change, woman that will challenge the norm in society. I pray He will will rise us up as models that point to a better calling, a higher standard that in every fraction in our lives will glorify Him!!

All glory to God who never accepts "good enough"!!

Sacred Influence

2010-07-06T15:36:00.000-05:00

I have just finished the book Sacred Influence by Gary Thomas. Every woman needs to read this book.

This book will challenge you to be the best God would have you be. It will stretch you the standard God has for every believer. It will practically show you how to live as a wife. It will give you a new view on what marriage is all about. Holiness over happiness.

If you want to be stretched, challenged and changed beyond what any marriage book has done for you in the past, this is a must read. I plan on reading this book at least every couple years. I encourage you to read it and see for yourself!

Daily mundane pursuit of holiness

2010-05-17T18:48:00.000-05:00

As God seems to continually bring holiness to my attention, I find that I am thinking about it in the littlest things. Pursuit of holiness happens every moment of everyday. "Consider it all joy" in every situation can be overwhelming.

As I was putting away pots and pans from last night's dinner, I started to grumble about the lack of space in my kitchen which causes me to put pans away in the most awkward cupboard. "Happiness or holiness" came to mind. I then, at the prompting of God, thanked him for the dishes that are often dirty with more than enough food, evident by my bulging waistline. My girls are probably tired of hearing "Are you pursuing your happiness or holiness".

I am learning to thank God for the overdemanding kids that cause me to die to myself. I am praising God for the amount of home schooling two teens, parenting with an autistic child, keeping up with a toddler and trying to keep a house that has caused me to evaluate what is important and force me to learn to be disciplined.

I am starting to see God in the smallest details. The man today that seemed to be purposely walking as slow as possible across the parking lot was no longer an irritation. I thought of holiness as I seek to glorify God in patience.

The daily, often mundane, life is full of God's lessons if we only seek to focus on Him in every moment of the day. I am finding that as James says "faith without works is dead", my faith lived in the smallest things will someday give fruit to even larger things. Praise to God for His faithfulness and hand on my life.

Meditations on James

2010-04-30T05:32:00.000-05:00

One of the benefits to scripture memorization is the ability to redeem seemingly idle time. As I was rocking my sick baby to sleep, I was meditating on some verses in James.
Jam 1:2 Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials,
Jam 1:3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.
Jam 1:4 And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

Trials is what according to verse 3? It is the testing of your faith. Anything that tests your faith and remember according to James 1:13-15 that all things are trials unless we respond sinfully to them then they are temptations.. As Hebrews 14:23 states that all things not of faith are sin, so we are to respond in all things in faith.

What happens in the testing of faith is endurance. We will be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. What a promise! Something to remember when I struggle with just the routines of a day. Character is built in routine, mundane routine. Not only that, I am being tested to become perfect and complete.

What does James 1:12 say? Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.

What happens after perseverance/endurance? Once approved, we receive a crown of life. Crown is a picture - the eternal blessedness which will be given as a prize to the genuine servants of God and Christ: the crown (wreath) which is the reward of the righteousness (Strong's). What is the crown of life - it is the proof of salvation. It amazes me how often proof of salvation is in the Bible when you look for it.

Look at verse 12 closely, who is the crown for. Yes for those who endure, but also to those "the Lord has promised to those who Love Him". It is a PROMISE to those who love Him!! Yet it is only given to those who endure. What a beautiful picture here! Those who love God will endure!

It supports verse Philipians 1:6. He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion.

God sees the whole picture - the end result. He is at work, even now. Respond to trial in faith to cooperate with God's work. Rejoice,believer, God is there with you in trial to His glory. To His glory we will receive the crown of life.

My dreamiest spot

2010-04-17T20:08:00.002-05:00

My daughter and her husband moved out of our small town to about 15 minutes in the country. One of my favorites things about the change is the drive. The back way from our house to hers takes me by my favorite spot. It has hills and you can actually see them. Usually there are so many trees, it is hard to see anything for very far.

I dream of owning a country house out in those hills. I dream of cows, chickens, goats, a horse and a huge garden. I dream of being able to feed my family off the land and getting back to the basics. I dream of it so deeply sometimes, I can feel an ache inside.

I read a quip, probably on facebook, a little while ago that said, "God's gifts are better than man's best dreams!". Isn't that comforting!! I don't know why we don't have that perfect house in my perfect spot. However, I do know that God is sovereign and His love is perfect. He knows so much more than I do. He knows whether my dream would bring joy or sorrow. He knows whether my dream would build or destroy my character. He knows whether it would bring pleasure or hardship. He is so good!

I can learn to be content in His perfect will.
Hebrews 13:5
Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”
1 Timothy 6:8
And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content.

Be content. That is an impossible command in our human flesh. However, in God's strength, in His working in my heart, it is not only possible but very probable. I can trust in the perfect Father to provide for me perfectly. If I never see that dream house here on earth, I know I have a mansion over the hill with a Father that owns the cattle on a thousand hills.

God is enough!

2010-04-16T11:47:00.001-05:00

Testing! Trials! Stretching! Hardship! Pain!

Those words don't seem to bring vision of much joy. These are things I would like to avoid at all costs. Yet, scripture has them in a different light for a believer. They bring growth. Much growth if we submit to the trials God brings. He allows them to strengthen us and to draw us to Him.

I have endured much pain in the last six weeks. Trials that have cut deep into my soul. Piercing far more than I thought would be what I could bear. Times I was so perplexed in it. Can sin in another's life bear fruit in ours? A resounding YES if I choose to respond in a way that God would desire. It is hard to respond as God would chose though. It is hard to honor Him when our souls are so raw that the slightest brush causes to writhe in pain.

Yet as He heals me with His love and washes me in His word, my mind begins to clear. I see His goodness in the timing of a well spoken word, a sermon preached just for me, the gently comfort of His Spirit. God is enough! If all friends leave me and no one is left to stand by my side, God is enough! If I lose all I have and in the eyes of the world seem destitute, God is enough! I am beginning to see that maybe that is what He wanted me to learn all along. His sovereignty chooses those to enter my life, the turns my life will take and maybe just to show me ... God is enough! Oh how glorious to realize and all praise belongs to Him as I really understand who HE IS to even be able to say something so deeply profound as... God is enough!

Sheltered Kids

2010-04-16T10:51:00.000-05:00

Spring! The time for planting. Have you ever planted a small tree? It needs extra protection. Many times you will see a fence around it to protect it from nibbling animals. Often it will have a stake next to it to support it. It just needs the time to establish the roots. It is unable to protect itself or weather the disasters, natural or man-made, that happen to come along.

I couldn't help but think how that reminds me of being a parent. It is my job to shelter my kids until they have deep enough roots to weather life's storms. I am to protect them just as God protects us. 1 Corinthians 10:13
No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it. He doesn't give us more than we can handle.

When a tree is small the fence covers almost all of it, as it grows the branches start to poke out and expand over the edge of the fencing. Eventually the fence comes down, if the roots have been deeply watered and healthy, the trunk strong, it will be ready to weather many a storm and give shade to many.

Consider it all joy!

2010-03-11T21:39:00.002-06:00

Jam 1:2	My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials,
Jam 1:3	knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.
Jam 1:4	But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.

Trials. I feel I have had my fair share of them lately. We all do at some point in our lives. Health issues, work pressure, trouble with friends, financial problems, failures, sin struggles .. the list goes on and on. Sometimes we rush into things causing our own sort of mayhem and chaos to deal with. Other times, trials just seem to encompass us from all directions. They blow in from seemingly nowhere.

I was reading in John MacArthur's commentary. A trial becomes a temptation when we chose to react to a trial with a wrong human response. It changed my outlook on the struggles I am going through. How can I glorify God in this right now? What is the response He is looking for in me at this moment? Is this a trial God can use in my life or am I making it a temptation to feed my fleshly responses?

Count it all joy! Greek says count or consider and think it all joy is a choice. How can I in the midst of pain and struggle ... consider it joy! I must realize that I am not here for my happiness. I am here for my Savior's pleasure ... to glorify Him. Is there really anything else I would rather do? May I consider it joy because I know God works all things together for His good and mine! I may consider it joy because He is working in me to be perfect and complete! I may consider it joy because He is building endurance.

When I was a preteen we had a pool put in our backyard. One of my favorite things to do in the pool when I was all alone was to swim laps underwater. I liked to see how far I could get on one breath. It would be a lap to start and as I built lung capacity it would grow and grow to several laps. There were times I was so determined to beat my last feat, I would hold my breath until I thought my lungs would burst and it seemed I wouldn't make to the surface. That breath was always glorious. I would look back to see if I beat my last record. Making one lap was child's play now :o)

There are times I don't think I will make it. Times I think I can't wait for the next breath. It is too hard. Yet when I finally do. That glorious breath!! I can look back and see how I have come. I can see the flesh being stripped from my body and His glory shining through! Praises to Him!

Mercy

2010-01-14T09:40:00.003-06:00

My heart does rend the pain of sin that clutches at our soul
Who can climb free from it and finally be made whole
The reaches of the dark stained arms stretch far beyond our sight
It suffocates and twists and tears with a mighty fight

Oh! To tear away the scars it burrows in our minds
Lies piercing deep within our soul wrapping us in binds
Destroying all within our reach because we cannot see
But, alas, I beg who has the strength to finally set us free?

Not one, not one of mortal man can break the bond of sin
Oh, agony untold, of death that churns within
Deep within the heart, its darkness who can face?
This turmoil has to fall completely on Your Grace

Crushed beneath the weight I bear, broken deep within my soul
Yet through death, victory comes, and then He makes me whole
Oh life so sweet, He paid a price, He paid a price for me!
Liberating mercy, You died to set me free!

Oh beloved, don’t you know, you must call upon His name
Throw yourself on the cross and never be the same
You think you have the answers, yet you do not see
In Christ Alone! Through Christ Alone! By Christ alone! We’re finally set free!

Boycotts

2009-10-31T19:31:00.003-05:00

I was pondering boycotts the last few days. Now let me give a heads up first, I am not telling anyone to boycott or not to boycott. So please don't take this as condemnation one way or another. We are under grace and have too many things to worry about without dithering over something so trivial.

Lately, it seems that 1 Corinthians 10 keeps coming up in different studies. It is the chapter on not eating meat sacrificed to idols if it causes a brother to stumble. Throughout the chapter it talks about considering the brother and you don't eat because of love of others. I don't see another reason, actually Paul states that we are under grace TO eat it. We can eat it.

Where were they buying it? A temple ... what kind of temple? A temple to a FALSE God. Where did the money go? To support a false religion. Wow! That thought came as a shock. Paul had no problem spending money there. Why?

1Cr 5:12

For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Do you not judge those who are within {the church?}

1Cr 5:13

But those who are outside, God judges. REMOVE THE WICKED MAN FROM AMONG YOURSELVES.

The world will act like the world. Why are we surprised when they act exactly as the Bible says:

2Ti 3:1	But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.
2Ti 3:2	For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,
2Ti 3:3	unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,
2Ti 3:4	treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,

I will, when given the opportunity, support fellow believers out of a desire to help those I am called to love. I will support those companies that I like their philosophies and that contribute positively to society because it is common sense if you want a company to survive you have to buy from them. I will boycott or not because of a relationship with God and His guidance in my life. But in it all, I will remember that God is sovereign and we live in a fallen world and am called to be a light and love those around me.

Thanks for the memories!

2009-03-23T21:20:00.003-05:00

I was thinking about a sermon I recently listened to by Voddie Baucham. He was talking about brokenness in the life of a believer. I was considering his point about remembering who we were to point to God who brought us from there.

How many times I have blown it .... and I mean really blown it as a parent. Some memories that I cringed at and felt so guilt ridden because of my sin in dealing with my kids. Oh how I wished I could change it or at the least forget it!!! Yet, now I look at those memories in a new light.

What a wretch I was! But how great God is !!!! He has taken me so far. He has changed who I am. Only God could take a wretch like me and do anything with her. I have a wonderful relationship with my kids. Thanks be to God and Him alone.

I see those times of total rebellion, self centeredness and immaturity and how far I have come. God has taken the years stolen and given them back ten fold. I can look back and now rejoice. I can see God's goodness, God's grace and God's faithfulness. He who began a good work in me will be faithful to complete.

And as Voddie says "I am not who I should be, but Hallelujah I am not who I once was!"

Calico Quilt

2009-01-21T10:06:00.004-06:00

A poem I wrote awhile ago. But hey, it's my blog, I can put whatever I want here. :o)

The Calico Quilt

I have memories all fashioned with laughter and cheers

Bound together tightly with heartache and tears

Each stitch is so precious

One of a kind

Creating a masterpiece....

A calico quilt in my mind

The stitches uneven, the edges are frayed

Each square is different but don't be dismayed

It's highly treasured - one of a kind

Made by many hearts, this Calico Quilt in my mind

Mismatched squares by small little hearts

Stained, worn and loved in so many parts

My children so hastily put each piece in place

The more that I held them the quicker they raced

Each precious memory added a square

Softly I touch the fabric laid there

Many friends have added some squares of their own

They styles are different, but carefully sewn

Bright flowers and rainbows...Dark Patterns and hues

Each memory woven, tho' not all construed

Between the squares and framing each side

Family has sewn many stitches with pride

Childhood, teen years, mother and wife

Bright vibrant images dance into life

The most beautiful artwork in the center is found

Each stitch is perfect; Carefully bound

Christ took all my sorrow, my tears and my pain

Transformed it to fabric with shimmering grain

With colors so brilliant, it's hard to conceive

What He did with this quilt, the hour I believed

Tho' years of creating

It won't be complete

Until the day that I lay it

At my Savior's feet

But for now I enjoy

The uneven stitches

The brilliant rainbows

The vibrant pictures

It warms my soul

It is one of a kind

This mismatched, tattered and loved

Calico quilt in my mind

20 years!

2009-01-21T09:08:00.004-06:00

My oldest, Portia, turned 20 today. It is incredible to realize it has been this long since I first held her in my arms. Where did the years go?

As I cuddled Benjamin in my arms today and think how far away 20 years seems, I realize it is just a blink. It won't be long until diapers give way to bicycles and bicycles to cars. It sure makes me wish I could hold the days a little tighter.

Happy Birthday my beautiful daughter. May you cherish each moment completely for when it is gone it is gone.

May I hold my kids a little tighter today, squeeze them and smell their hair, listen to the giggles and nonsensical banter with contentment. May I touch their hands and contemplate their softness and may I read with them, play with them and laugh with them. May we make the memories we will hold on to because that is all I will have left of today.

Building a Foundation

2009-01-02T22:19:00.003-06:00

Home School. A simple phrase that dominates so much in my daily life in both activity and thought. To be successful, all I needed to do was spend 13 years working to make sure my children were at the top of the class of kids a year older than them, athletically well trained and had some knowledge of any subject that could ever be brought up in polite or impolite conversation. Okay maybe not impolite but definitely the bizarre. :o) Watch out Jeopardy here they come!!

Okay, well seriously that might be an overstatement, but how much do I place my success as a parent on how well they are schooled. God knew what I needed!! Some girls that weren't going to cooperate with their training to earning a Nobel Prize. Having graduated one girl and starting at the beginning with another, I can sure see where God has led me.

When did our success become lined up with a worldy view? Have we traded academics for Godliness? The wisdom of man is foolishness to God. Yet we strive for it. Am I not more successful if my kids love God with all their heart, soul and mind? Isn't God pleased with my parenting when my children live as regenerated children of God? If my kids can't read a third grade level, yet surrender their wills to God's desire ... isn't he pleased? Does monopoly teach bribery when you have to pay $50 to each player when you are elected as chairman of the board? Uh, wait a little off topic.

We are refocusing this year with emphasis on Charlotte Mason, Teaching the Trivia and other similar teaching styles. Though I pray my children will progress far beyond a third grade level. I desire most to prepare them for the future God has in store. My goal isn't college. Yet, if college in is His future then so be it. (and He will provide!)

Productive Struggle

2008-12-30T14:41:00.003-06:00

As my house clutters itself, the kids are left alone and many things should be attended, I struggle. I used to think it was just a battle of self-discipline that I struggled with. I knew the things I should be doing, but continued to do the things that waste my time with little to show for it. Sounds familiar. For what I am doing, I do not understand; for I am not practicing what I {would} like to {do,} but I am doing the very thing I hate.

Maybe if I would just try a little harder, stay a little more focused. Yet, the deeper issue is a battle of flesh. I am self-centered. I like to entertain myself. It is harder to let myself go neglected for the sake of family. Is this what Paul meant when he said women were saved through child-bearing? Is it through a family we learn to die to self? After 5 kids, I would think I would be a little more dead.

Yet, the beast of flesh rages on. I had heard that self-discipline is gained by daily doing the mundane. Finding joy in the trivia of life. I thankfully praise the God that promised He wouldn't quit until He completes a work in me.

I am off to slay a beast.

Oh Christian consider

2008-12-29T11:16:00.004-06:00

This has been heavily on my heart the past year. Salvation of the believer.

I spent the majority of my life hearing about "the prayer". Say a prayer and you are saved. Repent and ask Jesus into your heart and He will come. If you question your faith, just remember the day you prayed. If a "believer" is living in sin, he has been wandered from the faith, he is acting carnal or backslidden. Is belief enough to save? Absolutely! However, is our definition of belief Biblical?

Jesus said that you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength! Belief in a Biblical sense takes up every essence of our being. It isn't just the mind from which say a prayer comes from, it is also from the heart and soul from which we follow whole heartedly. It is a complete change! Biblical belief conforms us to His image.. it is every fiber in our being will be sanctified to Him. Our flesh is stripped and our perfect Spirit is released. What a glorious permanent and continuing birth! The spirit is alive and it will grow!

Matthew 24:13 But he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved.

1 John 2:4 The one who says, "I have come to know Him," and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him;

1 John 4:13 By this we know that we abide in Him and He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit

Again and again, the Bible preaches endurance and a sanctification process. Salvation isn't a prayer. It is the redemptive work of the Holy Spirit because of the sacrifice of our glorious Lord Jesus Christ. Just as in the miracle of creation, out of nothing but deadness God creates in us a spirit - alive and regenerated. We were dead!!! Just as the bones in the valley that God breathed over, God breathed on us. We can pray all we want but unless God does a redemptive work in us, it is void.

We will change, we will begin to look like God, walk like God, act like God and love like God. "Be ye holy because I am holy". He who began a good work WILL finish it. Ezekial promises that we will have a heart where the laws of God are written on it. A NEW HEART.

	Ezekial 11:19-20 "And I will give them one heart, and put a new spirit within them. And I will take the heart of stone out of their flesh and give them a heart of flesh,
	that they may walk in My statutes and keep My ordinances and do them. Then they will be My people, and I shall be their God.

I am not talking about works. We are saved by grace and it is complete and forever. You cannot lose it. I am talking about evidence of salvation. James said, "Show me your faith without works and I will show you my faith by my works". You will have change and works because you are saved. You don't work to become saved.

How many "Christians" are going to hell? How many will lament on the day of the Lord and cry out as those in Matthew 7 Many will say to Me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in Your name, and in Your name cast out demons, and in Your name perform many miracles?And then I will declare to them, 'I never knew you; DEPART FROM ME, YOU WHO PRACTICE LAWLESSNESS. There are many and they claim to know Him. It breaks my heart. I want to scream the truth. Oh that one may hear and be forever changed!

Oh "Christian" consider please. Look at your life. Is there evidence of salvation? Do you see the fruit of the Spirit growing in your life? Do you love Him, desire Him, seek Him? Do you love the brethren? Are you repentant when you sin? Does He chastise you as a loving Father? Do you know His voice? If not, cry out for God to do a work in your life.

Welcome to my corner

2008-12-29T10:14:00.000-06:00

An interesting concept... blogging. Millions of people sharing what they think on a forum that others can read the private, deepest, quirkiest thoughts of people they might happen to not even know. A public diary? Or just a place to share your thoughts without interruption?

I might give it a try. Not sure what will become of it.